Can I be a Mama for a minute? Yeah? Ok, good.
Today is Mouse’s birthday. Six years. That’s how long ago I got to hold her for the first time. I remember that day so vividly. I remember each of my littles “birth” days clearly. Mouse’s was a bit different though….
See, when I was eight weeks pregnant with her, I had a threatened miscarriage. I had a subchorionic hemorrhage. After lots of appointments, we were told it was highly unlikely I would carry the baby to term. However, I remember our wonderful doctor telling me that what medicine says isn’t always right and that science isn’t the end all, be all. He told us to pray. So, we did. There were lots of scares, lots of ultrasounds and lots of the clot is growing and the baby is not. There were lots of tears. We were told if I carried her to 23 weeks, she might survive. J and I just continued praying. We went in for a big scare around 27 weeks and I was convinced we were in BIG trouble. I was on the verge of hysterics. We had an ultrasound-THE CLOT WAS GONE! The scare was because the clot between my girl and me was dissolving!!! The joy over that news was overwhelming. Dr.’s put me on modified bed rest (because I had a not quite two year old, Sissy, to take care of at home) just to be on the safe side.
For 12 more weeks, she cooked in her cozy condo. Then, all of a sudden, there she was. This short, juicy, plump 9 lb. 2 oz. ball of perfection. I remember when they handed her to me the first time, she was crying so hard. I remember looking at her sweet face and telling her it was ok because Mommy was there. She opened her beautiful eyes and looked straight into mine. She took a deep breath and stopped crying. She’s been that way ever since. A little snuggle from Mommy and she’s content.
Fast forward to six years later…
There is no one who can get my goat better than Mouse. She keeps me on my toes and runs me ragged on lots of days. She’s also strong and bold and knows exactly what she wants, when she wants it. We found all these characteristics out, quickly. This is who God created her to be. She doesn’t question the world because she’s created her own. J and I joke that she flutters like a butterfly everywhere she goes. This is Mouse’s world and we just play there. Ha.
Here’s the other thing about Mouse. She’s as fierce as a lion and as soft as a lamb, all in the same breath. She looooooves her people-and her Mama.
What does this have to do with life on the Rez, you might ask? Stick with me….
Our sweet, sassy girl, fully embraced this adventure. When her Mama was a crazy person because she was working out her grief, Mouse reminded us all how beautiful it was here…how the sun hits the mesas in the morning and evenings, how the lizards roam and the desert birds sing, how the rain makes the air around us smell sweet and how Jesus made ALL those things. Mouse finds a friend wherever she goes, this means she’s found her folks here and she loves them deeply. She finds the joy in all the things this adventure has shown us and even on hard days, because she has them too, she’s not afraid to ask for what she needs…from us or her Heavenly Father.
My prayer is that she’ll always know who she belongs to and that her heart will always be for the underdog. I pray she always lets her yes be yes and her no be no and that she NEVER lets this world strip her of those things. I pray that as she continues to grow, she’ll walk in the strength of having Jesus in her heart and that she will always draw near to him first. Above all else, that she’ll praise and follow Him all the days of her life.
She’s a bundle of excitement and sunshine and it’s her birthday!! So…birthday blessings to my little Rez girl!! Mama loves you to the moon and back!!